The Random Bibliophile

by Renee Alexis

Renee Alexis
20-something Filipina, an introvert who loves young adult fiction, brush pens, Taylor Swift, and BTS. Coffee runs in my bloodstream.


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2023 Reading Challenge

2023 Reading Challenge
Renee Alexis has read 0 books toward her goal of 30 books.

Overcoming Insecurities

It's no question if one of us has them because I know we all do. Nope, don't even lie to yourself by saying otherwise, accept it because that is the reality and having them is completely normal. We are all accustomed to being self-aware, we know we are not perfect and there are some things we dislike, or even hate, about ourselves. Having insecurities is what makes a person human. Having them is what makes you different from all others. Having them is what makes you unique.

Growing up, I have been prone to discrimination and criticism. It was not easy to be the "fat kid" in the neighborhood and being labeled as that for almost all my life is probably the worst insecurity I have until now. People can be pretty insensitive and mean when addressing you with what they think are harmless jokes. They always have something to say about how you look, or how you talk, or how you act, or even how you think. It's a constant struggle to keep up with society, to blend in with the norm so that people will stop making nasty comments about you. 

It's difficult to overlook the things you hate about yourself, but it's not impossible. Over the years, I've been pushing myself to improve. There were countless times when I just gave up hope on completely ridding myself on being so insecure. It was a dreadful battle but I know I just have to do it no matter what it takes.

Presently, I am proud of myself for finally having the confidence I didn't have before. Don't get me wrong, I still am shy and I still have dozens of insecurities but I learned how to combat them and push them aside. I learned the hard way, but I learned nonetheless.

Today, I share with you, my tips on how to overcome insecurities and I hope these will help. To those young girls who grew up believing that the body they have isn't what society calls "beautiful", please, please do not conform with what the majority says. You are beautiful, no matter what you look, no matter what size or color you are, no matter how short & stocky or how tall & gawky you are. The society has no business shaming you, you do YOU.

This is the first and most important step in overcoming insecurity. Life isn't a competition. You do not need to be more than them, you just need to be happy and proud of what you have and what you are. People do not expect you to be perfect because nobody is, stop being so hard on yourself and start seeing the great things you possess.

Putting regard for your own well-being and happiness is not narcissistic. Once in a while, you are allowed to think about yourself first. Start believing and loving yourself more, this is the next step after you stop comparing yourself to others. Accept and love your flaws, you cannot alter what has been given to you. Just think about this, if even you couldn't find the strength to believe in yourself, who else would? Self-love is totally acceptable.

Having people who appreciate you for who you are will do you a lot of good. They will boost your self-esteem and make you feel good about yourself. Stop hanging out with the wrong set of people who you call friends. They are not your friends if they always give you a hard time. You do not need approval from people who only critics you of your bad side. Just stop hanging out with them, cut off the negativity once and for all.

Learn to ignore people who do nothing but bring you down. When they realize that you are no longer affected by what they say, spreading negativity will eventually wear them down. And you won't be the one to look stupid after all of it. I have also read this article a month ago and it was a complete eye-opener. It permeates good vibes, READ IT. :D

These are fool-proof tips in battling those bad vibes and being insecure. Just make sure to do it slowly and improve day by day. The change will not come easy, you will be faced with a lot of difficulties. You will have self-doubt and lose focus on what's really important, but don't forget why you are doing this in the first place. You are doing this for yourself, for the greater good of yourself.

It took me years to be the person I am today who radiates positivity and confidence. Though I may have my bad times, I always pray to God that He'd give me the strength to face each day with a smile. Start battling your insecurities today, guys. Start seeing the YOU you have always wanted to be!


  1. I'm really, really insecure about my body and what other people say about it. In the past years, I've learned to not really give a fuck. I know better than most about how my body looks, and I'm working on it. I don't need people giving their two cents in - which is so unwanted and not even asked for. It makes a real difference once we stop caring about what other people think.

    xx, Richel Goes Places

    1. Yep, very well said Rich. Cheers for loving our own! :D

  2. These tips are what I need as of the moment. Ignoring people and their sh*t is not that easy, but I guess it is the best and most effective method to enjoy life! :) Hahaha

    1. The transition is hard at first but once you get the hang of it, you'll be a pro in no time! Glad you've learned something from me, Hazel ^_^

  3. These tips are also what I live by though sometimes I tend to forget especially the part where we shouldn't give a f. Lol. Thank you for reminding us. <3

    Bee |

    1. No problem Bee :) I sometimes forget to do that too, that's why I had the urge to write it down, hehe. I checked out your blog, I love it. Continue what you're doing! I'm excited to read what you'd write next. :D

  4. Great post, I love it, thank you for sharing!!!


  5. These are some great tips! I especially love the bit about not comparing yourself to others. I get caught up in that so much!

  6. I used to be insecure about how I look and my body, well until to say I can handle it better now. It's not easy to ignore what other people say, but when I learned to block their opinions off I realized the qualities I have that I should embrace instead of always comparing myself to people. As the saying goes Change what you can't accept, and accept what you can't change.

    1. That saying is just so on point. We can always improve the things we dislike about ourselves, yes it would take hard work but in the end, it will be totally worth it. :D

  7. Thank you for this tips! I am currently having blogging insecurities and I think this could help me out :)

    Kai xx //


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