Midnights 10.21 💙 It's me, hi. I'm the problem, it's me

Midnights by Taylor Swift

This is a collection of music written in the middle of the night, a journey through terror and sweet dreams. The floors we pace and the demons we face. For all of us who tossed and turned and decided to keep the lanterns lit and go searching - hoping that just maybe, when the clock strikes twelve ... we'll meet ourselves. - Taylor Swift

Like tradition, since Lover, here I am again because Taylor Swift has released her tenth studio album named Midnights! And I was so excited about this release for months because Taylor's blurb about it resonated so much in me. I mean, who doesn't have midnight thoughts? Who hasn't had late-night anxieties where you can't even fall asleep because of an overactive mind? Who hasn't cried silently just because you've thought up vivid scenarios that haven't even happened yet?

That's how Taylor's words affected me. Because I'm at this point in my life where I'm already done with my studies, where I'm already working to provide for myself and help with household expenses, and where I have somehow already achieved some of my dreams. I'm at this point in my life where I'm at a plateau or sometimes at a crossroads that I can't even put how I feel into words. I'm at this point in my life where I'm just living day by day on routine, with nothing to look forward to because I have all these silent responsibilities that have built up over time. I'm stuck but at the same time, I'm lost. It's a confusing phase to be in. And somehow, this album came (yet again) at the perfect time.

Here are my initial thoughts about each song:

Lavender Haze*

Upon listening to the first track, I was taken aback because Pop Taylor is really back. Lover felt like ages ago and hearing Lavender Haze heavily reminded me of that era, and I love it! I've read tweets from other people saying that this song was very similar to I Think He Knows and yeah, I can see why they are saying that. And I do agree. Lavender Haze is ITHK's big sister.

Favorite Lyrics: I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say

Maroon*

I loved this track the first time I listened to it. And when I read its lyrics, I fell down into a hole. It was like I was transported 4 years back when I had a bad falling out from a 5-year relationship. It's a bittersweet feeling but this song is just something I couldn't help but love even if it did remind me of a painful memory.

Favorite Lyrics: How the hell did we lose sight of us again?; Sobbing with your head in your hands; Ain't that the way shit always ends

Anti-Hero*

First lyric and I am already loving it. This song is just *chef's kiss*. Taylor described it as a song that she wrote about her inner turmoil and intrusive thoughts, and while its beat is boppy, there are so many things to unpack from it. I also watched the Music Video for it and it was hilarious and satirical. I am obsessed with this track!

Favorite Lyrics: I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser; Midnights become my afternoons | It's me, Hi, I'm the problem, it's me | Pierced through the heart but never killed

Snow On The Beach (feat. Lana Del Rey)*

Track 4 and this has got me into an emotional mess. The soft vocals, the hypnotic melody, the blending of two voices meshing into one. Snow On The Beach ... It must be nice to have someone to fall in love with. I wonder when it would be my time.

Favorite Lyrics: Are we falling like snow at the beach; Weird, but fuckin' beautiful

You're On Your Own, Kid*

The vibe of this song is so much like this is me trying and maybe that's why I loved it so much at the initial listen. It made my heart ache a little bit. It reminded me that all I have is myself to turn to when everything goes haywire. And that's really how I sometimes feel.

Favorite Lyrics: I didn't choose this town; I dream of getting out | Everything you lose is a step you take; So make the friendship bracelets, take the moment and taste it; You've got no reason to be afraid

Midnight Rain

I think people who like False God will love and appreciate this track, just like me. It's a song that I had to listen to again and again to really feel what it's trying to get through. And once that it grew on me, I couldn't stop listening to it, getting a different feel at every play. Taylor is really such a brilliant storyteller.

Favorite Lyrics: He was sunshine; I was midnight rain; He wanted it comfortable; I wanted that pain | He stayed the same; All of me changed like midnight

Question...?

This is a song that I want to know what the story is behind it. Like, what inspired Taylor to pen this one? Who or what is the inspiration behind this story? Is it from something that happened in reality, or is it one of those things where she is making up a story just like the trio in folklore?

Favorite Lyrics: When she said it was too much? Do you wish you could still touch her? It's just a question

Vigilante Shit

This is something that one would hear in a thriller movie, you know that scene where the protagonist is getting ready to do something big - an act of revenge maybe, or a big revelation that will fuck things up. This song is giving me no body, no crime feels and I am here for it!

Favorite Lyrics: Don't get sad, get even

Bejeweled

I didn't really vibe with this song at the first listen. But after some replays later, it's kinda catchy and I am so interested in learning the meaning and story behind the lyrics. Also, this song feels so much like Mirror Ball...or is it just me?

Favorite Lyrics: What's a girl gonna do? A diamond's gotta shine

Labyrinth

This song made me sad. Just like Maroon, I felt the depression I was in years ago and it's something I've been trying to get over. It's a song so raw, it rips through the barriers I've been building just so I could forget how hurting feels like. At the end of the day, even when you thought you've already moved on and are stronger than ever, there will always be something that will pick on that wound even when it's already healed.

Favorite Lyrics: You know how much I hate; That everybody just expects me to bounce back; Just like that

Karma*

This is one of the tracks that I looked forward to and I wasn't disappointed! I love it when Taylor writes something petty. Better Than Revenge, anyone? Hello, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things? my tears ricochet? Mean? I love it. Also, I just wanna comment on how this sound so much like that Halsey song, or is it just my imagination?

Favorite Lyrics: Karma is a cat; Purring in my lap 'cause it loves me; Flexing like a goddamn acrobat; Me and karma vibe like that

Sweet Nothing

Don't you just love it when Joe and Taylor get together and create a song? I mean, they make such beautiful and delicate tunes. Champagne Problems is waving. At the end of it all, I am just so happy for Taylor for having Joe and for being this in love and happy. We love a healthy relationship and that's just really the end goal, isn't it?

Favorite Lyrics: They said the end is coming; Everyone's up to something; I find myself running home to your sweet nothings

Mastermind

This is such a fitting end to a brilliant record, and it's track 13 no less. 13! Taylor Swift will never stop amazing me with her magnificent mind.

Favorite Lyrics: It was all by design; 'Cause I'm a mastermind

After listening to the 13 tracks, I was left contemplating this amazing album. Until a few moments later when Taylor dropped 7 more bonus tracks. I was not ready for it! And so I'll be editing this blog out when I will have the time to get my thoughts together for the additional 7 songs. I am so overwhelmed today but I am not complaining! It's not every day that you get new songs from your favorite artist. It's a day to be joyful and maybe I'm just a tad bit high from this album release that I will need a few days to digest it and recover from it.

For now, this will suffice my initial thoughts. Have you listened to the album? If not, I'll be linking it below! xx

P.S. All the song titles with (*) are my initial favorites!

The Random Bibliophile

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